Yeah. Have had that twice. Kind of wish I hadn’t, cause it’s not likely to happen again and now I know what I’m missing

It’s Ohio’s vibe. Boring, dull, uninteresting, a bit creepy. If you’ve got Ohio rizz, you have terriblely boring charisma

I kind of dread the day I stop being appealing to gay men and start being appealing to straight men. Well, less the latter, I doubt I’ll ever pass so well as to be appealing to straight men… During the brief unfortunate time I was stupid enough to look for connections, I had 0 interest from women, the only interest I had was from a few strictly gay not bi men. I seriously doubt transitioning is making me more appealing to women, so I feel like I’m slowly removing my dating pool as I become someone I like more. Well, it’s for the best anyways, dating/hooking up was a disaster and I should have known better then to try. (It’s not a problem that women aren’t interested in me, it’s not something I’m upset about, it’s also for the best given some brain bugs I have)

Sorry for trauma dumping in random places across Lemmy, it’s just nice to get the thoughts out of my head and into text sometimes

I’m just mystified how you know yourself that well, sitting here in my puddle of self doubt

No it’s actually laying your head in someone’s lap and having them gently run their fingers through your hair while reassuring you everything’s ok

Cans of condensed chicken noodle soup is my mental and physical illness food. I keep a bunch of it in the cabinet. Having difficulty with solid foods? Soups got your back. Can’t bear to scrape together the function to cook or order food? Worst case scenario, slap a can in a bowl and run the sink as hot as it goes to add the water if heating it’s just too much to do

I may have 0 opportunities to meet people and a body and face that very few people would be interested in… But it’s ok, because I’m far too insecure, depressed, and full of self hatred to have anything approaching a healthy relationship! So really, it’s for the best.

The cure to male loneliness is transitioning and making it female loneliness

But I should be in a dress too

Joking about how for a firetruck to be unrecognizable as a fire truck, you’d have to remove so much useful stuff from it/limit access to things from the outside so much as to render it ineffective, and also being kind of absurd by pretending that unmarked firetrucks are at all the subject of what they were talking about

<abandoned joke>

Ay, DIY gimp skills make a homemade meme truly tasty

Really really weird to see jc and jk outside of their weird sketchy internet corner

This is such a delicate subject. How do you talk about a societal broad issue without hurting individuals? With posts like these, there will always be people who feel aren’t the real subject of it that feel the weight of it, and it’s not a healthy way to approach things like this. There is a societal level problem with men’s treatment of women, but men likely to see this post likely aren’t part of that problem and want to improve things, and posts like this only kind of serve to to put people down. However, it’s not like this post shouldn’t have been posted, it’s a serious topic that should be taken seriously and not ignored.

It’s normal in restaurants that aren’t fast food

Why you gotta be like this

Honestly I’m more clueless about my sexuality than ever. I think I’m more attracted to women than men, but a healthy dose of gender envy makes that difficult to quantify. I kind of… just aren’t attracted to actual people by default? I kinda beat the ability to have romantic and sexual feelings towards people out of myself because trauma and depression, I kind of have to actually try to feel them. Because of that, it took me a really long time to realize my attraction to men. Well, that and gay porns never done anything for me (because I’m not gay, despite liking men. Gender identity stuff). I’m still sometimes afraid I’m not actually attracted to men and am just too damaged where relationships and intimacy with women are concerned and am desperate for another outlet for those desires. Realistically though, I have romantic feelings for a guy and enjoy having sex with him, and if that’s not attraction I don’t know what is. I’m definitely not ace, though, I’m a very sexual person, masturbating a ton and using dildos a ton. Things get more complicated though, my (few) sexual experiences with women/afab and fem presenting people have been pretty uncomfortable, but I think that’s a gender dysphoria using my dick thing, not a partners gender thing. Idfk, I’m a giant ball of overthinking and anxiety

Yeah, time to filter lemmy.ml. ah well

I gave up all hope that it’s going to turn out all right, and more or less stopped caring

Towards the end of the decade Total Annihilation would be released and it’s modern day fan made remake, Beyond All Reason, is really good. Sad there’s no campaign though, I really loved the TA campaign